Transition is the uncomfortable space between where/who you were and where/who you are hoping to be or become. The pain of transition can make us romanticize what life was “before.”
And because transition usually requires the process of releasing things and/or people that are toxic to our growth, we often have to learn how to forget to remember.
Forget to Remember
In the throes of transition, it’s common to romanticize the place, literal or figurative, left behind. For this reason, you must forget to remember.
You have to FORGET all of the memories that bring you comfort about the place you’re exiting so that you can REMEMBER that the challenges and discomfort related to transition are not only necessary but also WORTH IT!
Yesterday during my morning journaling, I had a breakthrough related to this idea of forgetting to remember. Over the last several months, I have been revisiting the year 2016.
This “revisit” started when posts and photos kept popping up in my social media memories from 2016. My revisit quickly turned into me romanticizing about that time. As I read my social media posts and looked at photos, I kept thinking about how purposeful my life felt during that time, especially compared to the past two years.
Yesterday, as I journaled, I realized that I had started to accept an unrealistic point of view on that year. Yes, the photos and the posts were uplifting, and it did seem like so many purposeful things were happening in my life.
Yet, what was going on behind the scenes in my life was less than picture or post-worthy. The reality was that year taught me how much of a people pleaser I had become. In the name of living out my purpose, I was burning myself out. The word, no, was not a part of my vocabulary in my conversations with others. I obliged every request. I was constantly putting myself on the back burner.
I betrayed myself that year, and to add to how I treated myself, I also lost a close friendship, which felt like an additional betrayal.
When that year ended, I had to make some profound changes. There were a lot of broken pieces around me. I will forever be grateful for my husband’s love and support during that time. Learning to put my proverbial oxygen mask on first was one of the most challenging transitions I have endured on my growth journey.
To grow from that tumultuous year, I had to forget about all of the “highlight reel” moments that made the year seem better than it was. As difficult as it was to navigate that intense transition, it was worth it! I am still reaping the benefits from the self-work I did during that time.
My Hope For You
A new year naturally brings with it the possibility of positive change. Most people, myself included, approach the beginning of a year with the desire to improve.
Yet, it is no secret how difficult it is to follow through on those changes.
If you’re preparing to enter into a necessary season of transition, I want to encourage you to keep going. Change is not easy. It requires courageous faith. The kind of faith that allows you to keep moving forward, even when you don’t see or understand the next step.
There will be times when you will have to force yourself to forget all of the highlight reel moments of the past that invite you to stay the same. And, you will have to resist the urge to romanticize your past so that you can remember that the decision you made to begin your journey is worth it!
My prayer for you is that you would FORGET, not forever, just for now, so that you can REMEMBER that where God is leading you is worth the discomfort. I pray that you will not romanticize your past to the detriment of your future.
5 Empowering Truths To Support You Through Transition
I want to give you five empowering truths that I hope will keep you inspired to keep moving forward on your journey.
- It’s worth it to release what is comfortable, for the beauty of what is next.
- You are allowed to change your mind to discover and embrace new possibilities.
- You are courageous. Even with the fear present, You can do great things.
- God has prepared this new beginning for you. And, His divine provision accompanies His preparation.
- Transition is hard, but getting to the other side is well worth the effort.
I resisted the urge to provide my context on each of these truths. I wanted to leave space for you to reflect on each and hold onto what is relevant to your journey now.
These five reminders have supported me time and time again as I have journeyed through my life’s transitions, and I hope they will also be a source of encouragement for you.
A lot of people resist transition and therefore never allow themselves to enjoy who they are. Embrace the change, no matter when it is; once you do, you can learn about the new world you’re in and take advantage of it. — Nikki Giovanni
Happy New Year Friend, I hope you choose to embrace the joy in change.
Until Next Time, Sending you love, courage, and MORE courage!
P.S: I would love to hear which of the 5 resonated with you. I invite you to share below in the comments.